seek and find

Saturday, August 9, 2008

31 july 2008
aside from the immensity of the overhead view, there are the new
friends, the friends that will, indisputably, be there for me when i
get a spout of malaria, to enjoy the joys of ice cream again and to
help with the inevitable set backs of life to come. there is, first
and foremost, Daniel Dayton. a lanky, handsome and charming red head
from the east coast, he immediately fell into best bud status, not
unlike Brett Buchanan did 6 years ago, or Andrew Vickers 3 years ago. we're both in environment and have a lot in
common but more importantly, have more differences than imaginable. he
is, essentially, a male version of Janna - just what i needed. then
there is Hannah, much like Saide but insanely athletic; her boy
friend is living in Burma, so she's a breed of her own. and Megan,
tiny, petite, fluent in french, wonderful. her family is from
baltimore but her fiance lives in France. she is 27, hanna and dan are
23. then there is Cassandra the great. 26, from southern california,
insanely intelligent, unsure of herself but sure about me. we live in
the same town, at least we will until sep 10, and have become very
very close. she is wonderful. smart, sassy, she and i have similar
ideas of aspirations and what we (reasonably) expect out of this...
survival and sanity being the top two concerns.

anyway, there are 75 of us now, 2 quit last week, and i'm sure 30 or
so will by march... those are the annual statistics, anyways.

i, however, will not be one of them. for some reason, whatever reason,
its not there. the quit. the give-up. the packing for home. i'm not
sure. i think if i'd have done this right out of college, it wouldn't
be so easy (and i don't mean, in any way that it is easy, but... well,
i don't really know), maybe it wouldn't have been so sure. there is an
end in sight. each little goal, realized or failed, is still a
triumph. you know?


Cassandra said...

I seriously can't read your blog without hearing your voice in my head... and hearing your voice leads the tears to well up and spill out. I miss you so much my dear friend, but keep doing what you're doing, and you will always have the support of your loved ones. You are in my thoughts and I can't wait for more updates. Love you!
Your Departed (but not deceased) best Banankoro-kaw friend (for life!),

Honna said...

Reading your blog makes me smile. What I wouldn't give to escape the grind of laboratory experiments for a few months and live a life completely foreign to me.
I hope the thought of quitting never ever enters your mind.

Megan said...

Just to set the record straight for your readers, I'm not a little engaged french speaking dwarf. Nor am I 27 (yet). Sure, standing next to dan 'big ladle' dayton, you and hannah, i may appear dwarflike, but from where I come from I am of a perfectly normal stature. (I'll let them believe the 'wonderful' part though). Glad I found your blog. It's cheering me up. Miss you.